Barb's Blog

Please don’t sensationalize the Epstein Files. It is easy to be curious and want to know all the details. But there were hundreds of real women, or rather young girls; daughters, sisters, classmates, and neighbours, who were taken advantage of – robbed of their innocence – and are still haunted by their experiences.

People often ask [mostly men] why do women wait so long? Why come forward after so many years have past? There are many reasons – trauma is usually the main reason. Embarrassment and shame are other reasons. Denial and/or self blame can replay its ugly dialogue; asking themselves why did they allow it to happen – these are all reasons to avoid or suppress their horrible memories.

Purposely suppressing memories is an unending battle. They never stay buried – they are like skeletons in the closet. Triggers happen. A name. A smell. A town. A taste. These triggers open the door. Once that door opens a flood of memories resurface. It takes years to confront them. Admitting and accepting the memories is typically the first step in deciding to come forward.

Remember, the “incident” happened many years ago, when they were a child, when they were manipulated and over-powered and unable to comprehend the situation. Years of suppression, years of trying to be normal, years of attempting to ‘keep calm and carry on’ are their efforts to cope, until they can’t.

Then, when they finally gather the strength and the courage to come forward – they often face people who doubt their stories.

Men think. Women feel.

Men who take advantage of young women think it’s no big deal. They think it means nothing. But mostly, they think there was no harm done.

It is a big deal.

It does mean something.

And yes, there was harm done.

Over a century ago you could trade fur for food. Back in the 70’s I could trade my Gordie Howe and Steve Shutt hockey cards for a Bobby Orr card. Neighbours would labour for each other no charge; I’ll repair your engine if you help build my deck.

Trade used to be beneficial for all involved. Now a days it seems you can point to a country and say, “I want your resources, give it to me or I will punish you.”

When building our home lumber costs were going through the roof – pun intended. During that time our southern neighbours wanted to create, or perhaps improve, their own Lumber Industry. “Send us your lumber. We will mill it and sell it back to you.” This was part of a Free Trade agreement, and was the reason why our home cost more than it should have. Wouldn’t it be better if countries chose to develop industries to which they already have the resources?

Every person has talents to which they can put to good use. Yes, there are people out there who would take advantage of these talents, this is why it is important for us to learn our own value and find the right market for our talents, resources and products.

In turn, every country has their own unique resources. And yes, there are people out there ready and willing to take advantage. But threats! Give me or else! Really?

If I wanted to buy a German car, or an Italian wine, or a French pastry, isn’t that my choice? It takes talent to create these products. Some may consider them masterpieces. Maybe I want the real deal and not some cheap knock-off that was made at a much lower standard.

When personal pride and natural talent is put into products we see it, feel it, taste it, smell it – that’s why we want it. When greed is the only ingredient put into products they break down and fall apart – that’s why we don’t care for them.

Let the masters of their domain create well-made products – and let the global society choose what products they wish to buy. Of course there will be transportation and or delivery costs – but that should be it. The tax is merely a penalty for buying elsewhere.

~ I hope this inspires you

If you are a writer struggling with your story, try this;

After I come up with a story line – or rather, once I have been inspired by an idea, I begin to jot down some notes, ie; comedy; Church supper goes terribly wrong.

Then I begin to explore the subject; I know a meeting would take place to plan the event; committees would be formed appointing who would be in charge of particular things; a theme would be established; and the meal would be decided.

If you have ever been involved with planning a meal, you can already imagine different scenarios that could take place. Arguments would arise over what meat to cook, where it should be bought, and how it should be prepared. Complaints over who is in charge of this or that. Other church members usually end up using the hall for other reasons and suddenly battle lines are drawn. This is conflict. It can be hilarious or tragic, it doesn’t matter, because conflict of any sort creates an interesting story line.

Exploring a Church Supper, what it entails and who is involved, will provide you with a lot of ideas for your story. The fact that it has a beginning, middle and end built into it is also very helpful.

1- Beginning / introduce the people who are planning the event. Where and when is it taking place?

2- Middle. Chaos ensues as everyone has their own ideas [personal goals / agenda] as to how this event should take place. Toes are stepped on, some people quit, some people take over, and somebody ‘borrowed’ the two big potato pots and hasn’t brought them back! A natural timeline can unfold as posters are made to advertise the Church Supper [and somebody no doubt put the wrong date on the poster.] The food arrives [and the ladies auxiliary discover the fridge is already full of Gerry’s deer meat!] Chopping and dicing the veggies can bring lots of arguments, “too big,” “too small,” “wrong angle of cutting,” it’s amazing how too many chefs can spoil a meal. Some seniors are not fond of new high tech appliances and this known fact can easily inspire cooking mishaps.

3. The End. The meal is served with some customer complaints, and clean up begins, and somehow the ladies come together in the end and decide to do it all again next year!

Whatever your topic, jot down related items, ie; Bank; money, vault, tellers, manager, red rope, exchange rate, etc. Then look at issues; bounced cheque, interest rates, stolen credit card, “next teller” sign, “closed,” and consider scenarios around these issues.

Exploring your subject can bring about interesting plot lines that will inspire more ideas for you to write about.

~ I hope this inspires you.

Whether or not I am right about this, I am going to try it anyways! Something tells me Spring weather will arrive before the Spring season officially starts.

The weather has been so unpredictable these last few years. Whenever I tried to grow a few vegetables my hopes were often crushed by the results.

One summer was too wet. Another too dry. Last year I built a greenhouse hoping to control the amount of water my vegetables received – this did bring better results. However, I think my timing was off.

Starting seeds indoors in little pods in late March or early April was always the norm for me. I would transplant them after the last full moon in June which supposedly promises no more frost until the fall.

The summer of 2022 I had little beans, green peppers, and tomatoes growing – but unfortunately my seedlings never amounted to much. They seemed stunted as if they had no intention of growing beyond their seedling stage. Then, to my surprise, in late summer or rather early fall my tomatoes started to flower and weeks later a few tiny, pea-size, green peppers appeared. Under the protection of my crude greenhouse [a simple A-frame with plastic draped over it] they continued to grow well into winter. By late November I was hastily plucking mid-sized tomatoes before the hurricane arrived. Perhaps they prefer the colder weather.

I tried to experiment with strawberries last year as well. I quartered a few berries and stuck them in pots. Something grew by the end of the summer but I can’t say for sure if they were strawberry bushes.

Thinking I may have started them too late I decided to repeat my experiment but this time I put them in the ground in late fall of 2022, to let the seeds hibernate over winter and hopefully begin to sprout this spring.

I did the same with the seeds from my burning bush. I dropped them in a row hoping to create a hedge. If strawberry bushes and burning bushes grow this spring – I just may prep my soil and plant my tomatoes, green peppers and beans this fall for next year.

~ Here’s hoping whatever seeds you plant they will bare magnificent fruit!

Watching an incredibly large bumble bee buzzing around the flowers today reminded me of the day I gave a bee a bath.

A few years ago while trying to clean my old and very neglected paint brushes I had to resort to soaking them in a mason jar with turpentine. I prefer to use Murphy’s soap or linseed oil, but nothing I tried seemed to be working. I set the stinky jar outside on my deck and carefully tucked it in the corner away from any critters.

To my surprise a bee appeared. NO! I thought – don’t go in there! She hovered over it and buzzed. I assumed she would fly off. But she didn’t. OH NO! She was a queen with a big yellow furry circle on her back. I had to save her.

I used one of the brushes and gently lifted her out and carried her down to the grass. Her legs were covered in slime. She buzzed and waddled angrily. It was clear she couldn’t fly – the paint and turpentine slime must have been on her wings.

I ran inside and put some warm water in a glass. When I returned, I couldn’t find her. I could hear her, but I couldn’t see her. I approached slowly, scared she’d find me first. I listened and followed the buzzz. There she was struggling in the grass. I felt so bad. I told myself I was safe from her attack as long as her wings were wet she couldn’t fly. I don’t know how true that is, but it made perfect sense at the time.

I gently poured a little water over her back. She was pissed! But I could see it was working. The stringy slime was slowly rinsing off her hind legs. So I poured a little more water – and watched – poured more and watched – rinse and repeat – rinse and repeat, until I could see she appeared to be slime free.

I slid a stick under her and moved her a few feet over into the sunlight and away from the slimy puddle. I stepped back and watched her for a bit. She was still making a lot of noise, but she seemed to be more agile and less angry. I felt good, believing I had saved her. But more importantly, I hoped she believed it too!

Needless to say, I don’t use turpentine to clean my brushes anymore.

When I started my blog I had intended to post articles and artwork. I uploaded some images on a separate ‘page’ but no one was able to see them … until now.

It’s still a work in progress – but I have a few pages for others to browse through.

~ I hope this inspires you to share your work as well.

After recently uploading my children’s book on Amazon, I wanted to check on its status. I have never been on a best sellers list before so this was exciting!

Then I saw the number, my book is ranked as being the 240,901 best book.

OK, so I am not in the top 100,000 but if you consider the millions of books out there – 240,901 isn’t a bad number. Right?

Canada: https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1999419375

U.K. : https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1999419375

U.S. : https://www.amazon.com/dp/1999419375